Question: We just got engaged, how do we discuss wedding budgets with our families?
Finances. The one area that potentially can provide so much discomfort through the planning process if not communicated properly from the very beginning. Don't let this be you, newly engaged couples out there!
Finances are tough conversations no matter who you are. Whether you are planning a wedding, buying your first home or justifying that $1,000 West Elm chair when the lookalike is on Overstock for half the price; these are all major decisions!
As your families begin asking about your ideas for your wedding day; location, design, guest-list, this is a great time to ease into the conversation around what finances are available. It is best to team up with your fiancé to tackle the task and for both of you to sit down with each of your families. This can be difficult, but likely your parents will want to contribute in some way or another. This may not be financially, but knowing from the get-go will help assist in the whole process. Try this approach:
“Are you able to contribute to our wedding and if so, what are you comfortable contributing so we do not have unrealistic expectations and can plan on our end to contribute accordingly?”
Talking about hard numbers from the beginning will allow a clear picture and understanding and will also provide peace of mind and comfort between the two of you through the planning process as to what is realistic and what is not as you select hiring specific vendors. It is important for you and your fiancé to be on the same page at all times financially because if not, it can be a very sensitive topic and turn the planning process from being fun to feeling more like a chore if conversations are avoided.
Kick off your engagement and the year of planning ahead the right way and have the budget talk with your families before you set yourself up for expectations that are not met. Decide what is most important to you and your fiancé and allocate finances accordingly.